First day of Long Term Care

I am home and relaxing after my first typical shift at a long term care facility...or what you folks know as an Old Folks Home.

I arrived promptly at 6am, figured out where I was to be, hustled my butt up there to have the LPN who was to train me, give me the once over and basically raise her hand and say, "Don't ask me any questions". Great, should be an informative first day.

My goal...try to figure out where a few of the things are, who a few of the patients are, and what the hell I'm to be doing and it what type of time frame.

Here it is summed up: Do a shitload in a short amount of time.

You start at 6am getting pills together for 27 patients and just imagine...approximately 9 pills each patient and the occasional Insulin shot. Yes...and when you get that done, you start agin because it repeats itself at noon. Luckily I got to leave at 230. I made it through, the LPN chummed up to me, because I helped and she got to sit on her duff, and I managed not to kill anyone.

For the next 2 weeks I work straight through, sometimes working 2 shifts a day. This will not include my parenting schedule (that will have to find it's own way into my life).

When I arrived home from work this afternoon, Bobby said we were going to friends house for some sort of lamb bbq? (me, I'm vegetarian). I looked at him and said, "would you be terribly disappointed if I just stayed home to finish my Pediatric Medical Calculations and then curl up on the couch?"

HUH!!! ? this is family stuff, I go to your things!!!

I almost cried, he must have seen the tears welling up and said , "OK., I guess."

thank you

thank you

thank you.

I made blackbeans,brown rice and sweet potato chunks...watched my boyfriend Anthony Bourdain, finished my homework, knitted, folded laundry and am no going to wash the MRSA off of me (which I should have done first) then hit the bed...with my book.

hugs and kisses

m

center for balance

The other night I made time for myself to go to yoga. I had missed my running due to my orientation at the new job and felt like I owed it to myself, and to Synda, to show up to something...
It was in an adorable tiny studio in Loveland and we attended the "candlelight" class. It was dark and I had no idea what I was doing. I have previously been going to the Hot Yoga classes which Synda used to teach. It's similar to Military Yoga and would kill a frail person if not knowing what to expect. Candle light yoga is more similar to flow...but it doesn't really flow if you don't know the names of the positions and have to crane your neck to figure which direction your butt is supossed to be facing.
As we worked through the class I felt confused and couldn't hold a pose. I knew it was because I was not thinking about my body I was thinking about what comes next.

As we walked home, Synda commented on how strong I am. Yes, I'm strong. But it doesn't do any good until you can use your strength.
I have no balance.
I know I have no balance in my life right now.
The lady who was with us made a fabulous comparison for me, and it really hit home.
She said," It's like a potter's wheel and clay...once you let your mind go and know your center the clay just lines right up with your body."
You have to know your center, you must have balance in your life, you must let your heart line up.
Maybe this is why I needed to go to that candlelight yoga.
center

redneck party deuce

a few more choice redneck pictures from the redneck party...I just want you to know I have a huge scab on my forehead from the curling iron trying to fashion a mullet...
(click the picture to get a better view).....and no we did NOT let the kids drink beer...it was for the picture

Excuse me, I think I killed the Sim Baby...

yesterday, we had a SIM lab. Sounds exciting, huh? It is somewhat...but also somewhat funny. You step into a classroom which is full of mechanical mannequins which can be programmed via the computer to cough, cry, have weird heartbeats, and give birth. Yes, give birth.

this sim above is the one I was using (not me in the picture)

pregnant and gives birth....
birthing....
So, to start the day I did my vag (grossest word ever) check and the laboring mom was at about 4cm. Needs to be totally effaced before pushing...good, I'll move to the newborn, see if I can do a nice easy assessment. I walk over...look at the screen, everything seems pretty good. There are a lot of things laying out for me to use. Itty bitty blood pressure cuff, stethoscope, intubation tubes, heel sticks, feeding tubes, diapers...basically everything.
I got my stethoscope and started to do my evaluation. I unwrapped the swaddled baby and started listening for lung sounds, heart beats and to see if there were any heart defects. As I was going through the motions, the nurse standing next to me started giggling...Your baby's face is turning blue. I look up and gasp! yikes...what's going on? I see the heart rate has gone up...I start to panic...hmmmm First thing into my mind...go for broke...INTABATION... STAT! Like something off of ER I grab the tubes, no gloves (duh, fail), spray the lube on and start jammin the tube down the babies neck. Of course it gets stuck and at this point the girl next to me is laughing hysterically. My babies vitals are down the shoot and there is beeping galore...and the baby is now glowing blue. Jeesus christ...Jam, jam , jam...I wrench the kids neck back and the tube goes down. I slap the top piece on it and look at my work proudly...as the baby flatlines...Nice... UHMMMM...
The nurse next to me is laughing...I look over and say, "well, what would you have done?" She giggles and says, " How about just wrapping the baby in a blanket and put the hat back on? It was freezing...It had hypothermia from you taking the blankets off and putting that ice cold stethoscope on it....hahahahaha"
What? You mean NO TUBE? All I needed to do was burrito wrap that kid back up and all the bells and whistles would have gone back to normal?!!!
great....
I look over as one of the girls is yelping about the SIM mom "crowning". She gets her gloves on and the baby starts to appear from the gaping rubber vagina. Lovely. She says the baby is coming!...I say, "Hey, Isn't' the face supposed to be facing down?"
"Well, yeah...I suctioned, but the baby won't budge..."
I say again, "The face of that baby should be down." thinking to myself that the computer must be set for a problem birth.
The girl takes the baby's head and wrenches it so that the face is NOW down and CRRRRRRRRRRRuuuNch" Baby head is now down and baby head is a goner. She looked at me like I did it from across the room.
"Heehee, I said it is supposed to be facing down, not crack the head off and make it down!"
Uhm, teacher...I believe we killed the SIM Babies...
Lord, this is why we don't get real patients.

redneck riviera on Garrison Street...

Please enjoy while we recover.

the kid always has her hand in her pants or something...seriously, and while I was taking the picture of the guys...she just showed up...funny, her name is Hannah...the neighbor kid.

this about sums it up.

a snippet of the weirdness at the RedNeck party (2 words or one?).

All I remember is something about Cotton Eyed Joe and Jello shooters...no one blew their hand off with fireworks, so I don't think it was an actual full "blown" redneck party. enjoy...

I'm back into reality now.

Staycation...enjoy

I'm at work....
no one else is, really.
But it's ok. I'm working, thinking and waiting for the work day to end and the fun day to begin.
The weekend holds a BBQ at the Princess's house and then a "Redneck BBQ" at the Koldjeiz' house.
Bobby has been growing his patchy beard out for 3 days, I saw Aviators on his dresser and some sort of ghetto headband.
I'm not sure what I'll wear...maybe a shirt tied up in a knot and some too short shorts...curlers in my hair? who knows...but what I do know is that I will be with good friends, plenty of food, and lots of ice cold beer...
That is what Staycation Holidays are all about right?

Right...enjoy yours
xo
m

strength

My legs are strong...
They have carried me far.
My heart is forgiving...
It loves without thought.
My mind is vast...
It moves forward and openly.
My eyes are clear...
They see beauty in this life.
I am strong.

xox,
m