Thursday, February 11, 2010

new nurse diatribe 101


I worked last night. 7p-7a...a long long shift, especially when you are running around all confused. I said my normal mantra before I left the house, " tonight you will lear, relax, and enjoy the new opportunities." well just by saying that I am pretty sure I ruined my entire night.
When I arrived I was given my assignment.: 5 patients,1 student nurse and 1 transfer coming form another floor. Ok...I know...all you grown up nurses are saying , "you big cry baby, why don't you come to University where we give 6-8 patients?! quit your belly achin" well, I don't work at University I work at poedunk community where it's usually 4-5 patients....and on top of that I'm a new nurse...not even an RN...I'm an LPN working the same job as RNs, with RNs, for less pay...
nevermind that.
The first 3 patients were Ortho (had hip surgeries) fairly normal and at night my golden rule is Medicate and Monitor...sleep babies sleep...I made this golden rule up but is very valuable for night shift. I had one nursing student who took care of one of my patients for part of the night. This is always awesome, but quite confusing when they leave, you feel like you have never seen the patient before.
Then a spleen injury and a telemetry patient (my first heart monitoring!!!) he was a mess.
so here is one: snowboarder vs. tree.... spleen laceration...which totally sucked...but the bigger issue was at this point he hadn't crapped in 4 days, which was making him nauseous, pissy, gassy and just plain old sad. his tummy was sticking out like a beach ball and hard a s a rock. (something like this minus the stitches)
He was peeing and his labs looked good, so I didn't think he was bleeding out on the inside...just needed to take a crap....but didn't want to listen to me. Just whined and complained about the stomach pain. I finally had to tell him, at 4 am, " get up and WALK!!! you have 2 legs..quit pushing that morphine button, drink some water and walk...fart...take a shit...I swear it will change your world right now." he grumbled and got up.
Last patient: transfer....my first Telemetry (Heart monitor) patient. He was going through alcohol withdrawal, had Hunnington's (which makes you shake), and sinus dysrythmias (crazy ass heart beat), . Oh yeah...and explosive diarrhea. yep...
they barf,shit, shake and see things...funny while in college and you can dump them on a doorstep somewhere...not so funny when they are your responsibility.


so while my charge nurse and the 4 other nurses had 2-4 patients...I had 5-6...I'm not even an RN...i'm an LPN...working as an RN.
whatever. at one point I heard the charge nurse say(under her breath), "she is driving me crazy running around like that." Boy howdee...I swung around on my heels and said, "You know what?..I apologize to YOU if I am bothering you....but I am a new nurse. I am busy...and I like to make sure my patients stay alive on my shift." She came and apologized later. I knew she was embarrassed that I heard her...but oh well. This new nurse is not going to be eaten by her own kind.
I am here to learn, laugh and like I said keep my patients alive...for a mere 12 hours...thats the rule....
then i go home and drink.
thanks for listening to my new nurse diatribe...


4 comments:

Lapetitemort said...

you rock

Douglas said...

Go get 'em girl!

Small Town Mutha said...

Wow! Thanks for sharing that. Felt like I was there :) I spend a lot of time in hospitals with my ailing dad-I don't know how you do it.

JB said...

well despite that stupid nurse, I would be thrilled to be taken care of by you!