Monday, December 27, 2010

The Centers of My World

frienemies
I have two kids.
I have a daughter you know as Olive.
The center of the world, or so we pretend....She is sassy, bossy, loud and did I mention bossy?
She tells us what to do, she tells us when she will do it (if ever), and how it should be done.
It starts the minute her eyes pop open in the morning to the minute they close at night.
Her force directs our families orbits, all of us....Especially the 14 year old.  His orbit is forced to follow her pull and it is often tortuous to witness.
I have a secret...
He is my center. 
Ilin 3 years old
I look at him and my heart fills with all the good gooey things Mom's feel.
We have gone through so many things together. 
He kept me grounded when I wanted to die.
He made me get up, by default, when I could only lay in bed and cry.
Death, divorce,love, hate and childbirth...
that kid was there.
An old soul,
Strength and wisdom packaged with tears and smiles, and sometimes vomit in my purse.
I secretly keep this all to myself.  I cherish him like no other.
I try not to pick sides, although it is so very hard.
I hear them argue and the rationale only a 6 year old can bring. 
He often tries to comply, but there is no winning....even if you do give in, you still lose.
He has learned this, I stay silent with my discipline in hopes the lesson will be quick.
He is strong, yet compared to her, he has to be weak...
because her pull is so forceful.
There is no winning.
except in my heart
he is the center of my world.
ilin blue

3 comments:

Mint Julep said...

so sweet, m. that boy is handsome too!

Douglas said...

What an awesome post, Mys.

one of many said...

Awww... how cool and sweet.

Just make sure Olive doesn't see this blog now or in the future. Could get messy.