I started my day by covering my tattoos as best as I could manage. Not always easy when its 100 degrees out.
Made it to my paperwork meeting for the new job. I actually had everything filled out and in order so the lady behind the desk was quite pleased, which in turn pleased me. She took my picture twice, and was kind enough to gently tell me I was grimacing in the first...I could have told her that...I apparently grimace in all my pictures. The second was proved to be a bit better. Paperwork was signed, copied, and given back.
"you have 15 minutes to get to your next appointment...the physical and drug test"
There used to be a day when I would worry about it, but now my biggest worry is not being able to pee or better yet, knocking the pee over when I set it on the ground.
The medical assistant was speed and friendly.
"wash your hands, go in the bathroom, pee in cup...DONT FLUSH"
grabbed my cup as I was doing the peepee dance...
"what are you doing?"
I'm dancing to Prince, what do you think I'm doing? I gotta PEE...
he laughed,"Girl, You are pretty funny for a nurse."
what's that supposed to mean?
I did my magic in the bathroom, emerged smiling and handed him the cup..." don't spill it, that's all I got, because I missed the cup for the first 7 seconds"
He did the drug dip....
3 minutes later...
I jumped up and down and clapped my hands together like a three year old
stopped abruptly and said , of course I did, what do you think I am, a druggie?
He looked at me, "most nurses around here aren't very friendly let alone funny....I only have met about 3 in the entire time I've been here....I sure hope you make it over there."
for the next 2 nights I've had the dreams where my teeth are falling out of my head and I can't find my classroom with the occasional flash of having to pee in front of a crowd.
I feel lost and scared. I usually enter this kind of change with odd curiosity...lately I can barely function.
It will be fine.
it's a new job,
not the end of a lifetime
It's a beginning