Friday, November 15, 2013

OCD.... i have anxiety.

I'm having anxiety.
I wake up in a freaked out state.
I'm counting.
It started when one of the girls at work said we should all go back to school.
Immediately I stressed.  We?  I started feeling that feeling of being behind.  I am behind.  I am behind in life, i am behind in everything.
Then the kids.
Am I reflecting my "behindness" on them?
Of course I am.
I am stressed they will fail....
Because I am failing.
Bigger stress...Not sure what I am failing.

I paid the bills.
I vacuumed.
I worked out....then I realized I have not RUN
I have not run in a month?
What if I can't run anymore?
of course I can run...right?

knitting.  i cant knit because I can't finish anything.
Last night I cooked the worst dinner in my life.
I have anxiety.



1 comment:

Lapetitemort said...

Hell, you just finished school, why go back?
You finished!!
You are not behind, because I've never finished any schooling after vo-tech, lol.
Breathe, do WHAT YOU WANT TO!!
There is no behind, there is only your life to live.