Thanks for the encouragement

You know...
I just really needed that little bit of encouragement yesterday.
I got a call from within the hospital that they needed a MA float/perdiem to fill in.
I said, "I'll take it" It's not nursing but its patient contact and will let me use some of my skills.
I marched my little butt down to the lab, asked for a bunch of butterfly needles and tubes to practice drawing blood and crossed my fingers.
**Carlos did ask who or what was I going to practice on...I said ARMS, what the hell do you think...I'll find some somewhere... (he was nice enough to tell me to come back if there were no arms willing....there are always people in the lab willing to lend in arm...it's to make up for all the bad sticks they had to do in school.)

When I got home I got on the horn and called the ever willing Synda to get her skinny, non veined arms to my house so that I could practice. (Thank God for her) She is never excited about it, I'm pretty sure she hates needles, but she still sits there and lets me do it. I got it the first time and she only said the tourniquet hurts, and that the poke hurt like a poke...but nothing major. One tube of blood and a bit of relief I think I'm ok.
I need a few more arms to practice on...but this is a start.

It's Friday and after I work a bit maybe I can come up with something real to post. It's been a few dry months.

xoxox
write ya later

Sometime it's just not worth it

Remember all that complaining about school? Well now I'm really going to complain.
I'm irritated. I'm irritated that school is the way to go, so I did that, yet I can't get a job with the LPN lisc. I got. It's killing me. I am one of those people who wants to help people. I enjoy it, but an online resume just doesn't come through for me. I am smart. I can use computers (which is saying more than most), I am friendly, and I'm an excellent employee...why can't someone give me a try? "We need more experience"...Yeah I get that part of it, but how the EFF do I get experience if no one will hire me? I will be going onto RN and I know there are a ton of jobs for RN's but what if the same thing happens? What if they say, "new grad? no thanks?"
Right now, I just keep plodding on. I have applied for about 25 jobs. Nothing. One place actually said my schedule was too busy. Hello? I can't quit the job I have to just go look for other jobs...would that be smart? Come on...I told them I am actively looking for a LPN job, my current employment knows this and is encouraging me to continue on with nursing, so if I find a LPN job I will leave this job for the new. What's the big deal?
Well...I can't make things happen. What happens happens....

Yesterday I put it all aside and just sat and knitted. Told myself to finish something it will make me feel better. I went to school in the evening and when I got home Ilin (12 year old) had made dinner for me :) He made our favorite Toodly Noodle. It was in the fridge just waiting for us.

it was so nice. then he made cookies. ...that was even nicer.
I guess something pay off.

Senior Care

First week of clinicals has left me feeling sad and empty.  Not because of the draining factor but for the mere fact we throw away our elders.  Senior Citizens stuck in rooms, 2 people per area, left at the mercy of an often very un-compassionate CNA.  Waiting for someone to help them get onto the toilet and getting yelled at if they attempt it by themselves.  You better hope you have Alzheimer's by the time your kids leave you there.

No control...over anything.

I learned to pass millions of pills, fabulously mixed with thickened shakes or applesauce. I reminded the disgruntled LPN who was teaching me of "best nurse practice".  "hey, don't you want to check this insulin first?"  "How about we sign off on the Narcs before we forget?"  "You need a glove before you draw that blood...and maybe an alcohol wipe?"  I had a lot of eye rolling, but I'm sorry, it's for the patients safety too.  

I slowly picked through tray after tray of pills...looking at each bubble pack and comparing it to the order.  I found one set of orders where the nurse had been giving the wrong amount of Coumidin for 5 days.  She forgot to alternate.  "oopsie" she said..."little med error, bound to happen."    And yes it is, especially if you never even look at the order.

They try to teach us to treat every patient as we would our mother, or someone we dearly love.  The problem here is that you are dealing with LPN's (which are one degree lower than RNs) who became LPN's 15 years ago and never moved forward.  They got a job in long term care than stopped and now are not happy that we are there, learning new things and possibly moving further than they.  They are angry and it shows.  

My nurse yesterday laughed as I talked to each patient, rolling her eyes and prodding me to go faster.  I  asked how they were feeling and got the standard reply of "ooooh I hurt all over".  I bet you do, sitting in that wheelchair all day.  I had a couple of funny things happen.  One CNA came to me and said Ms. SOandSo has pain under her breasts.   OK, I can look at that.  No big deal.  So I go into her room and the CNA is "getting everything done at once"  which I applaud her for her time management but everything should not be done on the toilet...out of respect, dignity and it stinks in there.  So as the CNA is giving a spongebath, brushing teeth, letting Ms. SoandSo take her nightly crap, I walk in and say,"Let me me see what you have going on here...among everything else"  With a  smile...I lift a large pendulous boob which would give Africa a run for it's money, and take a looksee.  Oh My.   So the Aide tells me she swears she cleans under there.  I give her a sideways look because by the look of the cheese under there it hasn't been cleaned in at least 3-4 days.  I get the medicated powder and gloves, wet wipes and a piece a candy...(remember, this is all being done as she is taking her nightly, possibly weekly BM, and it is a little ripe in there)...and I gently lift each boob and instruct the CNA to wipe GENTLY, not wipe all the skin away!  Jeesus!  Here let me get some sandpaper and scrub under your boob for a minute.   I dry it gently and start squirting the powder into the vast depths of the folds.   "OOOH  that is NIIIICE,  I smell Gooder, huh?   I Love you, You must be new.  You are so kind...I smell so gooder"   Yes, Ms SoandSo, you smell gooder and hopefully your boobs feel better."  

One down 30 more patients to go.   

Next few rooms go smoothly then another CNA says Mr. Bigbutt has a few red spots.  Okie dokie...let's look.  We get him in the lift, get him up, I gently pull down his underwear and there you see 3 huge redspots...you can tell they are sore.  I put gel packs on them to help until the wound care nurse can get there.  1 hour later the CNA says oh yeah, somehow Mr. Bigbutt's pads came off when I was changing him.   ?????? These things are "stuck" to his ass with gluey stuff, also he has ahd a major stroke and couldn't reach his own ass if he wanted to.  So I go in to take a look and put new on.  The Cna had gotten the chucks stuck on the top of the gel pad and I guess when there was some resistance ,she just gave a good tug..., which in turn yanked the skin right off of his ass.   Owie, you say>?   Well that is right.  Now, not only do we have a red spot we have and open bed sore.   

I felt bad for him and angry for the rush job people feel they have to do.

I'm not bagging CNA's .  I was one too.  I think we just need to make it a goal to care for people...not just get through the shift.  (maybe it's a training thing)

All in all it was good....3 more weeks of it....in  a place we can't make a difference except by being nice.  I took the time to talk to the people and listen...I'll probably take longer than most but it's the least I can do.

I realize this is a topic many people don't care about or think about, but you should...there is an entire generation of people who had amazing lives and now are stuck in a place they must call home with room mates they don't care for and caretakers who just go through the motions.  rough I say...and a bit embarrasing, for us as a nation.