My Sleep Sucked

As I have pointed out many times before...I don't sleep. Not by choice, but by some sort of evil curse. As Bobby lays next to me gurgling in his own snot and snores...I lie awake. I toss and turn. I listen to Love Line, then I listen to BBC America. Sometimes I lay awake and listen for wildlife....you know do all the things you do in bed except the good stuff; ie: sleeping or sex, neither of which I ever get, even by myself (TMI, It is Thursday after all).

Last night,as I listened to the whistling of Bobby's nose and gurgling of his snores I must have dozed off. Only to find myself being tortured by thoughts which were uncontrollable. The ones which remind me we have a basement just like Jon Benet's family...with a little secret room, where I am sure someone is hiding out waiting for me to fall asleep so that they can snatch my second born, and no one would hear (well, Bobby wouldn't hear,remember I don't really sleep). Thoughts of how I need to start my own business and am required to do the entire business plan while I sleep. Better yet, how I am so behind everyone else in life I should just get up now and start my new life...do things faster better and actually finish everything I start.

Last night was a night of thinking I was peeing the bed. Every 7.5 minutes I would come out of a daze and think, "oh my god...I have to pee. Did I all ready pee?" Reach down, feel the sheet. No pee. Get up wander to the bathroom, pee a dribble. Go back to bed just to do it again 7.5 minutes later. Yes I realize this is stupid, and I don't have an underlying problem. The problem is that I'm still trying to potty train the 4 year old not to wear a pull up at night so it is a direct reflection of my poor parenting skills that I must think I'm peeing the bed all night.

On top of that, Bobby's band The Mighty 18 Wheeler is having their CD release party this next week and we have been playing the new CD non stop. So much, that I can't stand to think about it (even though it rocks). So, as I went in and out of my pee filled REM state the background theme music was "My Broken Angel" from their CD. I kept yelling in my head...."this is MY dream!!! Everyone else that has to do with my normal life get the F out! Where is Brad Pitt to rub my bottom as I try to relax? Where is that mirror which makes me think I am better looking than I really am? Get OUT...Music Be gone! "

It's not fair. It's not fair that there is no escape from my reality.

Any one want to do this?

with me?
It's not a running race it's like the Amazing Race...in different cities.
Great Urban Race

Hump Stinkin Day

I all ready know it's going to be one of those days.
First of all I forgot to put deodorant on and that is by no means a good way for me to start. I was contemplating taking a mental health day to give my pits a break but it just doesn't seem possible.
I'm sweating just thinking about not wearing deodorant.
To add insult to injury...it's gonna be 80 here today. I think on "walk at work" day I will take my stinky armpits to target and help myself to deodorant, for peace of mind.

I have about 11 days left til my semester is over...one more test and I am freaking. I need to make a C, which I will, but a B or an A would be better. I usually really try not to think too far ahead, but when it's only one test left you MUST plan ahead...unless your grades rock, which doesn't happen to me very often anymore.

I better get back to work...
I'm thinking of attempting a mental health day...real soon
realllllllllll
sooooooooooooon

is it wrong to

eat cream cheese with a fork...
out of a container sans any sort of bread or cracker

i hope not.
because I just did


and it was yummy

Something beautiful

for a beautiful day...Although it is not Friday...it is Tuesday, time to prepare for the weekend

Pretty Little Cards for your Spring Party at Ruger Blue Designs by Synda

xoxoxox

Almond Funfetti Cupcakes for a picnic?

The Purl Bee has ideas for cool things for Mom's Day.

tHE bLACK aPPLE cute prints for your mom...or for yourself ;)

Bubble Inspiration make some yourself

It's not much...but take a peek.

Bikram...if it doesn't kill you

.......
the first day, you will wish it had on day two. I am not an avid practicer of Bikram...or anything for that matter,but since I started my 190 day count down to getting in shape I have really been embracing...,well, everything. At this point nothing can really hurt. I take that back, it appears that everything actually hurts, but I am proving to myself that if you stick to it you actually start to firm things up. ( Note*** guy in picture above...firming up)

Synda's Bikram class has not a single man in the class which looks like that. If she did, my 190 days would have been completed in 35 days because I would have attended every class, every day, in order to view that beauty.

Most of the men resemble this(see below), usually a bit hairier, often less clothes. You get my drift.

Look, I'm no Jenny Mcarthy either, but when you are busting a sweat and a move...you want something to look at to keep you motivated.

Back to class. 190 days have now moved down to 27 days and anything that seems like a good workout is getting my vote of approval. Bikram burns 1000 calories and that is all I need to say.
I have finally figured out how to make my body move into some of the poses and make it out of the 90 minute class in one piece. The problem is the next day I often feel like a Mack truck has tapped me in the rear. My weird muscles hurt; ex: armpit, crotch, ankle? Who knew I had muscles there? Whatever the case, today at work I can barely type, but in the back of my mind I know I burned 1000 calories, used my imagination to make man with hairy chest look like man with boner (above), almost mastered the "Locust Pose Salabhasana", and after a few more Jackie Warner and Jillian Michael's videos I will be ready for the summer. Will you?

Look at Me :)

Regardez Moi...she's back...I had missed her

Ira Glass,,,how could you?

How could you have allowed them to overbook the theater?
We just wanted to see you LIVE via satellite and hear your voice, so like butter.

We had prepared months in advance...purchasing tickets, figuring out the perfect evening of This American Life love, yet when we arrived there were no seats.
Not a one, so we chose to sit on the steps...until the mean 17 yearold manager told us we were a fire hazard. Can you believe that? A fire hazard!
What did we get in return?
2 make up date tickets for a NON LIVE rebroadcast
and 2 tickets to some crappy regular movie.

I cried all the way home
sniff
disappointed
M

Night at the Group...

There is a bar down the street called "Group Therapy". This is in ingenious name considering the derelicts which hang out there. It's the type of place where you are worried about your car, where you parked and how far it is from the parking space to the actual door. Once inside, just as scary.

We went to see a friend's band , "Burn", which plays absolutely NO original music. All 80's except for the few Nickelback crap songs they throw in. It's like Karaoke, but louder. It's almost as if you are in the middle of, let's just say, Opp, Alabama in the only bar with all the locals jamming in their big white sneakers playing air-guitar to Van Halen, beer dancing,and karate kicking... and it all seems OK....until you step back out into reality and realized you were in some sort of David Lynch movie.

After belting out Jessie's Girl and a few Toto hits I told Synda she had to come to the bathroom with me. I sure as hell wasn't going alone. As we rounded the corner to the bathroom we could all ready smell it.

Synda says, "Oh my God...I'm not going in there."

I on the other hand am a bit more adventurous and also work in a hospital so the smell was bearable, plus I had to pee, bad.

I walked in, walked out, "Give me my camera!"

Here's what I saw:











yes that is blood...lovely...but besides the stench, for some reason the toilet was clean.
very juxtapose, don't you think?



I got the hell outta there...but I did pee, balancing carefully.
When we got back to the table, Joe was making nice with the locals.






If these people are any of YOUR people, I guess I should apologize, but I won't because it was quite comical.
Although Joe did not have his Hooker Money available, he got a free picture to remember the event.
I believe she is trying to convince Joe for a 20$ you know what. That is why he is laughing.


This guy lost his pants and his teeth.
I'm not sure why we felt we needed to be discreet while photographing him. He was hammered.

We finished up our crappy beer and left via the cloud of cigarette smoke outside the front door, and watched the remainder of said family above dragging each other to the motel across the street. I bet they will have a nice time.

Another fabulous night at the Group Therapy.
If ever in Longmont CO. you must visit the Group.

I never....

Have been in an Ikea.....

You don't know Torture

Until you sit thru a 6-8th grade Orchestra event. Ilin plays the Bass (stand up) in the Orchestra. Last night was his end of year event. We needed to be there at 630 for "tuning" (like it matters). My day yesterday was beyond full, besides the fact I was feeling under the weather with a sore throat. I got up at 515am, got ready, got the kids up, took Olive to daycare, then Ilin to school,(he had to bring his bass from home, so normal walking to school was out)me to work, leave work at 340 to get to school by 4, take huge horrible Patho test, then get home. As I walk in the door at 605 pm Ilin is standing there, waiting like preteens do, somewhat under foot. Olive is yelling, "Woohoo...yeah Mammoos home...what's for dinner? Can we go out to dinner? Please, Please ...PLEAAAAAAAAAAASE?" Then Ilin says, "Where is my black button down? I can't find it ANYWHERE". HMMMMM? You mean MY black button down? "Yeah, Mom, the one I always wear." So I rummage through dirty hampers, closets, glance at clock realize we have 7 minutes to get there and no one has eaten. I don't know where it is.(later figured out it was at his dad's) So I pull a size 7 out of the closet, roll up the sleeves and off we go, dragging the largest instrument a child can pick, short of the piano and a thin 6th grader crammed into a shirt that hasn't fit him since 3rd grade.
Once we get there, Bobby and Olive walk to the Subworks to get dinner, Bobby cannot stand listening to the school music, and I wait, or better yet, am held prisoner while the music begins. The school does this horrible thing where they set it up so that the 6th graders play first then we are stuck there for the hour and a half listening to the 7th and 8th graders. They aren't allowed to leave which in turn means the parents can't leave.

I know what you are thinking. I should be enjoying this time, my son's musical event...but it hell on your ears. Imagine 200 stringed instruments tuned by 6th graders, add screaming babies, hot sweaty gym, and uncomfortable seating, and then you tell me to enjoy.

By the time it was over I was ready to die. Literally die.
this is another reason to not have kids...
or for some of you another thing to look forward to.

oh my aching ears.

buddies in the rain

It's still raining here

It was a Loan....

I wish these guys lived next door to me. This is why I love goofy men. You know they sit in the living room thinking this stuff up, laughing and carrying on like a couple of blockheads...

Fast Food Folk Song - Watch more Funny Videos

Friday

Colorado News: It's snowing...again. They say a possible 3 feet. Really?
It was 70 2 days ago. It just doesn't make any sense.

I ordered the camera below. I'm so excited. I hope I can figure out how to use it and maybe I'll make myself a fancy little camera bag! It will be here April 24th :)

I hope you all have a great weekend. I will be sewing cabana shorts for Ilin (wedding stuff), finishing a few gifts and furiously studying for my Pathophysiology test.

Hope your weather is better than ours

Shut Up!!!

yeah yeah...I know he's gay...just let me dream a little

Treating myself to something nice...maybe

Canon Rebel XS 10-Megapixel Digital SLR

not sure if I deserve it, but I was thinking of getting something which will take nice pictures, not go out of date in 1 year and be fairly easy. I have a rebel 35mm camera (film) and I like it, but film is so ...OUT...now...i guess an upgrade is due.

I am still toying with the idea. If I do this that means I have to organize all my pictures. have things in the right places ....I do love to take pictures, I just don't like the editing and storing.

It's a big purchase for me (Miss Tightass).
Jen @ jenniferburnsphotography
Jen Burns Photography website
helped me with this decision. so I went to the website to make my purchase and they are not accepting orders right now!!! I'm going to get buyers remorse before I even purchase.

what kind of cameras do you have?

Mod Baby Burp Cloth Tutorial

I'm one of those people who love to make things for people (when I have time.) You see I'd much rather give a gift from the heart than a gift from Walmart, so I started making these little Mod Burp Cloths for an easy baby shower gift.


what ya need for the project:
6 (comes in a package) prefolded birdseye diaper cloths
1/2 yard ( yard total) of 2 types of 100% cotton fabric (something easy to clean...washable)
thread
sewing machine
iron
***these would look great with How about Orange's new fabric***
a couple of podcasts and a beer if you like
This can all be done in about an hour and a half.


1. I like to wash everything first, so that it is clean and ready for the baby.
Plus the 100% cotton diapers shrink quite a bit.


2. After washing, iron the heck out of the fabric. It makes it so much easier to work with.



3. I started with a template of 4 1/2" by 20" because that is how big the center stripe of the diaper is...but after washing, the diaper shrunk about an inch...but this project is so forgiving you can fix it as you go. I like easy...so, we will adjust as we iron it and then sew it to the diaper. (remember, this is for a burp cloth, not for the Martha Stewart Show)



see, it has little lines all ready in it...just make sure your fabric fits in the middle of those.


4. Cut out, using the template. You need 6 total strips of fabric. I used 3 of each kind because it looks cute when you put them together...go ahead and cut out more...because you will want to make more.

5. Next iron 1/4 seam allowance around the sides. Remember, this is forgiving...so no measuring...just fold and iron. I start with the long side, then the bottom , then the long side then you can adjust the top to fit onto the diaper.


I mitered the corner by just snipping the corner and re-ironing to make it lie flat.
This is going to fit in the very middle of the diaper, which all ready has the lines laid out for you :) (told you this was easy.)



6. Now head to the sewing machine.
I picked a color thread which matched the fabric. It shows on the opposite side so you could even do white it you wanted nice clean looking backside, but I like the look of the stitch on the underside.


As you sew, sew close to the ironed edge and as you go along try and keep it on the middle area of the diaper (pin it). long side, bottom, long side then you can adjust as you go if you need to. You will be fine...burp cloth...nothing fancy .



7. cut thread..look and smile...now fold it into thirds and iron it nice and pretty.

5 more to go, a little ribbon and you are the star of the party ( I think anyways)

have fun, I love this project and after all the gifts are opened and in the nursery... you will be remembered every time there is a burp involved.

write ya later
m

A Thought for Friday

I saw this on Post Secrets and it made me smile and tear up...
People do care, most people are good, and some people realize life is what you make of it



"I work in a college admissions office at a preppy private college as a student worker. Whenever I stuff the rejection letter envelopes, I slip in a piece of paper while my co-workers aren't looking that says, "you will be amazing wherever you go. I believe in you." I hope that the people who get them know I mean it."

something to think about as you slide into your weekend

Friday...Peeps, Peppers, and Heavy Metal

Woohoo.. FRIDAY

came to work early...gonna leave early
gonna work out...
i have a babysitter
and I'm going OUT...

yahoo....

I'm gonna take pictures...
have great Holiday Weekend
don't eat too many peeps

Monday giveway winner

Carolyn!!! I'll be sending off the video (and a little extra) as soon as I get address :)
I hope you use it and love it...if not you can regift it!

yahOOooOo
myssi

Monday Giveaway Biggest Loser Power Sculpt

Just leave a comment, tell some friends, make sure in the comment you say why you want, or better yet, need it, a way to get in touch with you...and a small promise that you too will be trying to get more fit by June1st. We will randomly select a winner on Wed. AM and have it sent out promptly.
Ok...good luck...and I think the winner will also get a little tin of some fabulous bottle cap magnets we made a few months ago. Just to flavor the pot a bit...

Good luck and I can't wait to see the comments

Friday...and 2 hours to go

Hell to the Yeah...Because of NO MANDATORY OVERTIME....I will be leaving in about 2 hours approximately 9 am, right about the time my coworkers roll in. Hee Hee...Today I'm leaving the work for them....

Yesterday I went and bought the

so my butt can look like this:

Synda and I did the moves in the living room as my 12 yearold and his buddy had to be directed to LEAVE>>>GO AWAY!!!!!.
I plan on running today, and trying to eat properly. 60 days til beach.
Everything is toning up, yet we can't quite figure out how to get rid of the layer of Mom Belly. (Synda, we really should take a picture so people know what we are talking about) . Synda pointed out yesterday, that if we had started working out this hard right after the babies were born (5 years ago) we would be looking bangin' right now. No kidding. But we were in denial and now we pay the price.
The funny thing about the Jackie Video was : everyone had spray tan abs. We need those...they should sell the spray tan with the video...they would sell more videos, I'm sure of it!
Between the fake lesbian boobs and the spray tan I couldn't quit giggling...
but as far as review of the workout...it's the exact same...and I mean EXACT as SHRED. We are thinking that possibly Jillian Michaels and Jackie were Lesbian Lovers...makes it all that more interesting huh?
Picture it...picture it...see it in your mind

now let it go...

I will quit droning on....Later today I am going to do a Workout Giveaway...so check back :)

The point being?

(no offense if either of these pictures are you)


Can someone please tell the point of Facebook? It's sillyass stupid.
Don't people realize that the pictures above are really what the person you are gagaing over actually look like? come on people...
At least Myspace you can look at every ones over exagerated profiles.
Maybe it's all just self masturbatory...

Look at me...I'm pretty, I have boobs, I play guitar....mmmm don't you wnat to be MY friend and send me dirty emails?
My favorite records are: blah blah blah...
Oh Yours too? we have so much in common.
We are soooooooo cool and pretty too.

stroke it baby stroke it.

i think it is quite stupid...
if people spent as much time as they did on facebook and myspace, just getting out of the house and talking to people the world would be a better place....well, maybe not.
I just find it hard to believe that people can spend the better part of a day playing a "be in my mafia" game and never once talk to a real person.

idiots


ps,if you can't tell...I'm PMSing...and I'm pissed