360 days of my life #27 RED LIPSTICK CHALLENGE

360 days, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

Bobby said it reminded him, for some reason unknown, of the Ringling Brother's...I declared today "Red Lipstick Day".

after washing my face, brushing my teeth I needed a pick me up...MAC dragqueen acallin'...I applied this lipstick to my pencily thin lips...and to my fingers, chin, teeth and somehow my school book. No mascara yet...just some left over eyeliner...I thought to myself...what if I just decided to start wearing red lipstick...everyday? Would people snicker and wince as I walked by? Would people join in? Would they just get used to it and I would be known as the chick who always wears crazy red lipstick.

HMMMMM

I would invest in special soap to remove it from my coffee cups and all my friends would dread the kiss of my lips on their cheeks. My fellow running friends would smile as my sweaty face ran by...

"How can she wear red lipstick when she runs?"

strange...

There are bigger issues to worry about in the world.

If putting on red lipstick makes me laugh at my funny mug then so be it.

I challenge each of you to put on red lipstick and take a picture....

and post it...make a smile worth smiling about.

360 days of my life #26

better, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

360 days of my life #25

360 days, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

360 days of my life #24

360 days, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

I will be trying to lighten the blog posts this weekend but right now it is still too much. I could momentarily amuse you by talking about the 93 y.o. man I took care of on Sunday. He was learning how to use the urinal. Yeah, that is what I thought ...how do you live to be 93 and not use a urinal or a coke bottle or something...hell, even I have tried to pee into a Mickey's Big Mouth at a time or two of need.

But anyway...He couldn't really get up to walk safely...and didn't really want to because he had back issues, so I gave him the urinal...standard practice. I went out of the room to give him some privacy and was watching the heart monitor and noticed his heart rate shooting up. 72...83...96...107...

?????

back into the room...

"tap, tap, tap...Mr Oldie, you doing ok?"

"yeah I just need a little goddamn help....uh..."

I walk in and assess the situation. He is definitely sitting on the side of the bed...good sign...but then I noticed he was yanking and struggling with his ...uhhh. member.

Out of respect I did NOT just walk over and yank it and say "let me help you".

I nicely said, "Mr Oldie, could I help you stand up just a bit to make things a bit easier?"

grumble grumble...

I helped him stand up ever so slightly so that he could pull his wiener out from under his butt cheeks where it appeared to have retreated to....normal wiener safety area. He then jammed the plastic urinal halfway onto the flaccid thing...and proceeded to pee on the floor with a happy sigh.

Yup.. I left him to his peace and when he was all done and I was helping get his legs back into bed, i threw a towel on the floor by my feet and quietly wiped it up and then pretended to empty the urinal into the toilet...."flush......."

"Good job Mr. Oldie...you did a great job using that crazy thing."

2 weeks of school...i am all ready behind and can't even remember the way to put eardrops in. I'm tired, my kids hate me...and I want to fall off the earth degree or no degree.

Maybe it's the weather...but I doubt it....

you know what is really sad?

I'm even sick of wine.

that's a damn shame...

360 days of my life #23

update on Ed

The night was long for me,listening to each labored breath. It was the same feeling as when one of the babies had a cold and all you can do is watch and hope they breathe. Gurgle, gurgle...breathe.

Being the responsible party in charge, I was required to poke Eddie every time his breathing stopped. I knew in my head the lapses in breath were dreams and good pain meds, and as much as I wanted to pop some of his pain meds (don't think I didn't look it up), I didn't...and stayed awake the entire night. He got up 4 times to hobble down the stairs and go potty. Whimpering each step, yet still wagging his fluffy tail.

We headed back to the vet at 8 AM for the morning check up. The Dr. listened to his lungs and poked, prodded, and smiled.

"Yesterday, I honestly didn't think he would make it through the night...He really stole all our hearts yesterday. "

We aren't out of the woods...but we can see the the thick grass ahead. Rest, love and hopefully no bronchitis or pneumonia and he should be up and moving within 3 weeks.

As we all know disaster strikes fast and furious and often without a break. I try not to acknowledge the feeling of fear when I look at the calendar and know that I have gone many months without a reality check. I try to sweep it under the rug and think of the big picture with in the Universe. Everything happens for a reason.

Many things are so very minor and often silly to even fret about when I watch the news of the world. My Universe seems so trite...yet I must remember that my Universe is part of that Universe and it has it's reasons, cause and effect.

Thanks for all the great prayers and good thoughts...

and to Ms. Sara I would like to thank her for also praying for the bill :)

the total damage was 875$ this included 4 xrays...and the revisit was no charge :)

a miracle in it's own right!

Honest Dr's...who did the right thing...yet had a backup plan if things had gone wrong.

360 days of my life #22

At 7:20 the Angelic Miracle Worker Most Amazing Person/Vet in the world wants us to please come up so we can talk about Eddie and what we can proceed with. She said she got a small tail wag...and he peed!!!!!! (good) I jumped with joy. She said he is hurt very badly, but his bones are not broken. His insides are bruised, jumbled and she is very amazed he has recovered as well as he has. They don't have an overnight staff at the animal hospital, so she wants us to bring Eddie home for the night. ....OK...i am a nurse, but I am very scared. What if he starts to go down hill? You know he must have horrible pain...he can't talk. How will I know? She said if something takes a turn for the worse we are to transport him immediately to the emergency clinic (we are pretty lucky to have one right around the corner)...she will let them know what the situation is.

The kids have cried. Olive wrote a memory book, just in case he goes with Tonka....and Ilin is upstairs playing really angry sounding Punk Rock music on his bass.

I am drinking rum and coke ( i hate rum, but it was the only thing available) in the pint glass....and Bobby has measured the area for a 29 foot fence and called every fence installer in the area. We all deal differently.

I know that Ed was given to us by a weird fate...a weird higher thing that knew that he was what we needed as a family right then. I believe this. He's just a stupid big dog, but he has brought us all together in a way that nothing else could have at that time. Believing this has led me to also believe that being taken away so quickly could never have been in his cards. We need Ed and he needed us.

Last night I told Eddie , " Buddy... I love you so much. Thanks for having found us."

Life goes on...but I want it to go on with Ed.

it was my fault, I left the dog door open. He's a husky...they jump fences.

He took a full hit from a mini van going to fast as usual up our street. He went up and over into the windshield. They say this is better than going under for a dog his size.

His lungs on that side are hemorrhaging and have many contusions. He amazingly has no broken bones. The police think the car was going about 40 or so...It was so loud that someone called 911 and 2 cops the humane society and the neighbors came out. Eddie ran up the 6 stairs and the humane society lady said he just was laying on the steps...like he was waiting when she walked up. She told me he is very friendly...yeah I know. blood was coming from his mouth and he looked at me with the saddest sorriest eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Ed...I knew I left the dog door open and I didn't come back." "please forgive me"

The police were so helpful. She called the dog hospital we go to and told them we were coming. Eddie got up and cautiously got in my car and we sped the 2 miles to the animal hospital, even though the cop told me to please not speed there...they knew I was coming.

The vet couldn't get the Xrays they needed until he settled down and to this point still can't get some of the Xrays. She could see that his lungs on the hit side were bad...good news...the diaphragm is intact, now we have to wait and see what if his bladder made it... She told us we could go back and see him...he was so doped up he could only move his eyebrows. I pray he knew it was us. i whispered in his ear I was sorry, and that I need him to make it for my own selfish reasons...I won't be ok if he is not ok...not right now.

I am one of those people who totally will say if a dog damages a limb...just cut it off...they are strong. This can't be cut off.

My 5 year old just walked in...the tears all ready flowing. "he can't stay there!!! he has to come home...He can't die like Tonka"

I have lost so many things in my life. My parents, my brothers, friends and relatives..it appears that all my ill grief is saved to mourn for these pets. I am not good with emotions...I have 2: Anger and Hysteria...those are my best 2. Grief...not so good.

my dog got hit by a car today

i missed a day...so I will post 2 today

pictures that is...

360 days of my life #20

eddie cruisin', originally uploaded by v8grrl.

360 days of my life #18

On my birthday I spent the day driving 5 teenage boys to laser tag and food...

then I got home and he said, "shall we go to dinner?"

Yes...sure, so as not to hurt anyones feelings for making an effort.

When he suggested a movie...I suggested...

home in bed so I could watch Cops...

that's ok, because its my birthday

thanks Synda for taking Olive :)

360 days, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

360 days of my life #17

louder than the kids, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

updated the blog roll

You know what would I would really like ???
is some new suggestions to Blogs and such. As much as I love the artsy crafty ones, I have decided my mind can only take so much of the perfectly decorated house with the perfectly decorated kids rooms ...which never look like anyone uses them. Do their dogs EVER pee on the floor? Probably not, and if they did, it would be pretty and arty.
It makes me feel more inadequate than I all ready am.
So, any suggestions?
I like the cooking ones..those are my NEEEEWWWWW visual stimulation. Especially since I am not really eating anything good anymore, unless you consider oatmeal and flax seed good.
I also like the funny ones...about the real life moms...who's kids puke down the front of their shirts and their older kids are nut jobs...you know real life.
Those blogs make me feel adequate.
I like the funny knitting ones...or the ones Like Angry Chicken...where she always says, "because it's my blog, show, whatever...so I don't have to".
That makes me happy.

what I would also like is for people to comment once in awhile. In know people are reading by the number at the bottom of the page. Yes maybe there is nothing to really comment on, but a little mental support would be nice.

The blogs where it appears that no one ventures away for work bum me out ( this is why I miss Baking with Plath)...The blogs where they head to the perfect home office with every pencil sharpened and in matching colors...as much as I can appreciate them, it makes me pissy...
In my office I am lucky to find a paper clip...or an awesomely decorated ball of rubberbands.
They don't let us shop for office supplies at Anthropoligie.

360 days of my life #16

office, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

Senator Kennedy...I'll miss you and your 60 seats

I can barely listen to the news. We lost an amazing Bi-partisan seat this week. A seat Senator Kennedy held nobly for many years. It makes me sad to think about how all change will now come to a screeching halt. Independants should think about this. Maybe the changes which are coming are not perfect...but change is a START. things have got to start moving in a different direction. Anyone who has ever started a new system in their lives knows...it's never perfect to start, yet you go ahead, draw up a semi plan, set it into action and hammer out the kinks as everyone starts to use it....
New Orleans...and this headline read "Troops ordered "Shoot to Kill"
haven't heard about shooting people in Haiti.

Haiti...waiting for help...

Haiti...oh my god, it's sad...but do you remember what happened in New Orleans?, hell that was right in our own basement and we couldn't get there quick enough to help. It appears to me that Haiti is getting help quickly and alot of it. It is going to be a long hard road...but we can refer to New Orleans as one step below Haiti. We couldn't or wouldn't even help our own peeps. Heck, a couple of towns even shut down the bridges into the drier areas.
So, Haiti...we got your backs. We are getting there...and quickly...be thankful you weren't stuck in the "Dome" with raping,pillage, and death...and no way out.



I temporarily felt bad for Conan Obrien...but have now changed my mind...with the severance package of 33 million he could rebuild the entire Haitian area alone. So suck it up...and shut up...

I'm turning 41 this weekend. My ass thinks it is 65.

360 days of my life #15

argyle iTouch sock, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

day one of class...DOWN

why, why WHY????!!!!

do people really not have any life/clue or is it just me? I'm starting to think it's just me. Today we were required to come to class to get the syllabus and basically sit for 8 hours. Sure, we had a potluck...which just made me and my table partners load up on carbs so we can insure that we are large unhealthy nurses for our upcoming job roles. I ate my weight in corn chips and liquid orange cheese ( i know you are jealous).

So back to the subject. We were required to get to class at 9...i arrived promptly at 915 and then we sat around yapping about our winter breaks or lack of breaks for 2 hours!!! Hmmmm? I could have been doing laundry. But NOOOOO we have to fulfill clinical hours and in order to do this we have to sit in the class for 20 with nothing to do....but eat...and wish we were dead.

We did take about 1 hour and study ABG (arterial blood gasses) and Metabolic/Respiratory alkalosis and acidosis...I some point someone might have mentioned something about their beaver...but I got to laughing so hard...i wasn't sure how it fit in.

I can't wait til this is over.

360 days of my life #15

future nurse, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

360 days of my life #14

360 days of my life #13, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

4.5 months to go

I only have a few minutes before I have to head back to work for a telemetry class (look it up)...but I want to say how I am sooooo not looking forward to school starting back tomorrow. Although I only have 4.5 months left and I will be an RN...I can barely stand the thought of listening to the drone of the teacher (no offense teachers). I am attempting to stay focused and not think about anything further than next week. It is way too overwhelming. As with all changes comes stress and the wonderment of what we will do upon graduation. Nursing is a job which gives you basic skills then you move on from there with experience and learning of the skills. You pick your own path from there. My path is very undecided...it's just a path...a very unknown path. I'm pretty sure I will take the path less traveled in my mind, but the ever looming thought of having days off,income where I can choose any type of toilet paper at the store and not ponder the cost, and time to spend with the family is frightening. Tomorrow starts the last bit of this frontier. I will let you know how it goes as it goes along.

360 days of my life #13

indoor flower, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

although its snowing outside...this is the gift Mother Nature gave me inside

360 days of my life # 12

Saturday night bingo. $4 of fun and no wins


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Embarrasing for a Mother

My daughter is 5 1/2, defiant, sassy, smart, and we are having issues that we desperately need help with. I'm going to take the blame right up front. I'm not the greatest parent, I do what I can, but I'm pretty sure it's not enough.
Olive has started wetting her pants, bed, and whatever else. Last night was the last straw for me. After doing her laundry for the 4 th time this week(bedsheets and all) she peed on my bed. I understand it is for negative attention.... But how do I get it to stop? I blew my top. She got a spanking . I feel horrible and on top of that nothing is going to stop this way. I threatened to make her wear diapers 24/7...but the more I think about it.. She wouldn't care. Can someone please help me?

Dog Park Disaster and a Fault in Human Nature

Yesterday afternoon I headed over to the dog-park to let Eddie run wild with the natives; ie...other stupid dogs. It was a beautiful day here in sunny Colorado. Perked up to 50 degrees, which is downright balmy. If you have ever experienced frigid weather you may know that snow which warms,melts, then promptly refreezes every evening to make a beautiful glazy surface. With that bit of info...I was standing at the dogpark happily looking at the Continental Divide, glancing over every few minutes to see Eddie trying to hump some other dog...daydreaming about vacation at the beach when ....

WHAM BAM Thank YOU MAM!!!!

I was thrown tail over keister, I awoke looking at the pretty blue sky...only remembering horrible popping noises and not really knowing what was happening. I laid there until Eddie was drooling over me. Then I slowly pushed myself up, just to see the guy with the little black dog, who had plowed me over, walking out the gate.

Hello, I was just knocked out by your dog?!!!!

He left.

He didn't even help me up...or see if I was alive for that matter. There was no one else there. I could have been dead! But., alas, I wasn't. I cried all the way home, gasping for breath, surely more upset about the fault in his human nature than the damage to my ribs. I went to the doctor who told me exactly what I all ready knew. Nothing punctured, just bruised...physically and emotionally.

Take it easy...here's some Vicodan...no running until your body heals.

He didn't even check to see if I was alive.

sad

360 days #11

360 days #10, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

nike+ online?

anyone use it? I love it, and I would like to add some friends on my thingy...it helps keep me motivated...

360 days of my life #10

360 days, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

360 days of my life #9

I figured today was the day to start... No better way than just throwing it out there...no makeup,no nothing...obviously no fake tan.

I need to learn to smile, but self photography takes practice...hopefully in a few months those arms will be like Madonnas...whatever, I'm healthy.

360 days of my life, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

360 days of my life #8

turd, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

a gift from the chihuahua

The Sunshine Family Vs New York Times

This family featured with a matchup from New York Times on this blog Design Crisis got me thinking.... (the other family is on Decorno)
That first family, who lives in a Yert,...I had their dollhouse in the 70's..they were the Sunshine Family...but she was still pregnant then, glad to see she has given birth and moved from the trees to the ground...maybe the treehouse is a vacation home now...When will that be featured in HB?

oh wait a damn minute...they had a Yert back then too???? Why didn't I have that?
damn my evil hippie hating parents.
Looking at the price, it wasn't like my parents couldn't afford the Yert and the Treehouse.

maybe it was because they knew they would have to buy the truck, craftshow, and traveling wagon to go with it.

holy cow, if you are vegetarian

these are Yummalicious!!!!!

and look at the nutrition...
I did eat the entire bag, which is 2 servings, BUT...it's still only 320 cal/4g fat...and take a look at that damn protein!!!
I'm in love...
I put this with a 1/2 C rice, which brought my meal to 420 cal..which is perfect for me.
has anyone else tried this stuff?

Note From the Universe

from Mark F's photostream on flikr..check it out

"Thanks, myssi, for every single time you ever fell in love. Whether or not it was obvious. Whether or not it lasted. And whether or not you were loved back. It changed everything." I got this email this morning and it made me think about being in love...That feeling you really only get when you are young. Jesus, what if we could bottle that? People would no longer be depressed,overweight or bored. Your mind would continually be working...thinking about all those things that make the world go around. It gives me the butterflies just thinking about it. I like to think about all the times I have been in love and not loved back. wow...ouch. But it made me stronger, it made you stronger, and it made the other person and asshole...but that is different. It's a month till Valentine's Day and I have a special someone in my life. I actually have many special someones in my life (not as in the Swinger types),and I feel lucky. I would love My #1 Special someone to know how much I do love him, no matter what we have been through... As for all the other special someone's, the ones I know and the ones I will get to know in the coming years...I hope,by the little things I do, and try to do, it makes you feel and know that you are loved. I challenge each of you to bring on the love in the next month... Pay it forward. Show the love to your special someone, even if they have forgotten how...You can change your world and their world. I'd like to hear.

360 days of my life #7

360 days of my life #7, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

360 day of my life #6

360 day of my life #5

360 day of my life #5, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

360 days of pictures #4

getting ready, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

360 days of my life #3

360 days of my life #3, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

snowy snowy cold day

i'm frigid

why you ask.????
Because it is -14 degrees here today.
I'm sick and tired of it!
the hair on my legs froze and cracked off while I was walking the dog today.
YOU might think that is a blessing, but I'm thinking I might need all the hair and fat I can get to stay warm around here.
One breath outside and the air is frozen within your lungs,giving even my healthy lungs asthma like contractions.
My Thinsulate can't keep up. My longjohns feel like they are made of tissue....
and you know what? I usually don't mind the cold....
but this weather
BITES

360 days of pictures Day #2

#2 360 days of my life, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

on a lighter note...

I have a chair with wheels at work.
I have now decided everything should be on wheels.
Life would be easier, unless you had to go up stairs...
or down stairs.
I can roll many places with just a slight push off of my feet.
I can spin, roll, and
laugh...
everything should be on wheels

360 days of pictures Day #1

360 days of pictures Day #1, originally uploaded by v8grrl.

not a good start

this little girl, TonkaToy, will probably pass today. She is 14 I guess and not doing well. She has , what I believe, kidney failure and even though I knew this was coming it isn't any easier.
She couldn't get out of bed this morning. I whispered in her ear that it was ok to go to the big doggie daycare in the sky....I hope she isn't in pain, I sure know I am.
The kids said goodbye to her before we left today just in case.
I cried all the way to work
and at work...