3/14/19
'moonshine'
oh....the racist neighbor....
he appeared from next door, moonshine in hand ....
"ya'll got Lawn Jockeys where you come from?"
uhmmmm
I'm sure somewhere but not like around here.
"Yeah I bet they paint them white where you live"
(just pour it big boy)
I shook my head and waited for him to get to pouring the moonshine from the jar.
I don't miss much from the South, short of the Gulf Coast water, boiled peanuts and the moonshine.
Nothing like a nice warm jar of liquid fire to help make you think about what's wrong in the world.
The key to drinking moonshine with people you don't know well, is to laugh, pay attention, listen and try, just try, to keep your mouth shut.
Moonshine drinking is not the time to voice any political opinions, ways of life, or who you may think is the greatest Nascar driver to date.
Just don't
"down the gullet and opinions closed"
I made it through the night, without a single vegetarian , race, presidential, or NASCAR comment leaking from my moonshine covered lips.
it was a good night....
others did not fare so well.
The subject of Palestinians and Jews popped out during the last 2 inches of jarred fire and at that point I excused myself to practice moonwalking around the kitchen with Sissy and a quick twerking lesson from another person.
I travel to Nashville a few times a year to relax and see Sissy. This time it was to just get away, escape, and think.
Sissy....post moonwalking
Surprisingly enough I did not have a hangover the following day and was able to meander around Spring Hill a bit and try to relax...get my liver in order for St. Patrick's Day.
Wandering around Spring Hill included the Tractor Store, the town hot spot, where I was able to treat myself to a $9 'Heifer Please' t-shirt, evaluate the baby chicks, and look at all the bedazzled cowboy jeans....
It's the little things.
When I'm in Nashville, I am just me...I often don't wear makeup or fix my hair. I lounge about watching the bird feeder, admiring the Spring blooms and never really eat a full meal.
me....
popcorn tree aka cherry blossom
It's perfect. We go out and I go out as is and make conversation with anyone who approaches.
Golf with a grey haired man at the bar, cool eyeglasses with a beautiful 20 something who "loved my look" and a lot of "let me check out your shirt 'lil mama' "from good looking young men enjoying the Irish beer and what nots.
escape for me....talk, smile, laugh, mingle...
Escaping or running away from problems often seems like a great idea...until you have to come back, then it is much worse.
Almost as if things compile at a different level.
Like the spirits that be are trying to teach you another lesson on top of the shitty lesson you are all ready trying to figure out.
I talked a lot of stuff out and the main thing I was able to establish was that I need to keep talking to someone. I told Sissy, "but they (therapists) don't, and won't give me answers..."
She replied, " but it is going to help you figure it all out at some point."
We talked about going from relationship to relationship and being alone for a while.
I want to be alone, but I also want to be near my friends.
"have you ever been alone?"
yes, but within that alone I have always had my people close to me. I have always been very solo, especially when single. (hell, I'm so solo now it's ridiculous...) Going out , outside my circle...meeting people none of my friends knew...but yet I have always had my friends to come home to. Those friends who are always there...the people who just come and sit on the couch and hang. Slumber party friends, cuddle up friends, 'we got this' friends....
So....
alone?
maybe not....
I am an extrovert who lives inside her brain....alone.
Overthinking and very awkward,
yet seem to draw people to me within this weird personality default.
overthinking and awkward....
but so full of love.
write ya later
m
