Nursing report Telemetry

I'm trying something for my friends at Allnurses.  seeing if I can figure out a way to upload a report for them to copy.  If you are an RN and want a report, feel free to copy this one.  I think if you click the picture you can save it and print it full size.

I do what I have to do...

Right?

Right....

Here's what I did today.

I came home from work at 8 am, slept...then thought

I thought long and hard, and made a decision that I thought I would have liked to have happened when I was 15.

So, when Blue came home from school.  I took him to Floyds to get a haircut, which one I don't know, because for 25 dollars they really didn't cut much of anything...but whatever

Then to Target....

then I took this kid:

To Planned Parenthood....unbeknownst (sp?)

 to him.

He didn't act freaked or surprised, really.

We walked around the glass to the counter, where there was this adorable 20 something girl working.

"Hi, can I help you?"

"Yup, I'm bringing my son in here so he knows where his options are...if need be"

"Oh cool...well, right there to your left are condoms...free or donation....we can help with anything that you need...and there are a bunch of pamphlets on the wall...and there are some pamphlets about how to talk to your teens about sex....but I think you might have that one covered"  (big grin from her).

"yeah, Thank you   .....Blue, here are the condoms, not that you need these or will need them EVER, but if one of your "friends" may need one, or you guys have an issue you can come here, and they will help you, you know, if you are a bit confused...or whatever.   Buying condoms at the Walgreens is sometimes nerve wracking...so here, please be safe when you need to be."

He didn't get any, but he looked at the lady and said thanks...looked around, got his bearings and I could tell he was taking mental notes.

We got in the car and I said,"Just so you know there is another place to go, if you can't talk to me...but you can always talk to me.

"Thanks mom, it's cool"

I wish to God, my parents had given me more than trial and error when I was his age.

YO...I'm not dead...just tired

I'm not dead, I have just been working a crazy schedule, along with dealing with the kids: Homecoming,book fairs, conferences...it barely leaves any time for myself.

Hmmmph.

I started a little project, maybe even one I can finish.

It's going to be a Pixel Painting.

I had Bobby take this picture (I'm not going to say what it is) and Pixelate it in PS.

We Pixelated it down to about 8 shades of black,...ummmm you know, greys and such.

I am right now attempting to number them.

This is taking longer than expected due to drinking.  It is my day off and I like to live to the fullest on those days, so if I have to art it up while a bit tipsy I'll have to face the consequences right?

Once I get it all numbered in my 1" boxes I will start mixing the paint, then Off I will go!

Note to everyone, I have never painted before...so this is a crap shoot. 

Here's a short real life story for you.

At work the other night, I cleaned up so much poop I thought I was working at the Zoo.

I had a lil ol lady who every time I stood her up to get on the potty it would just pour out, even through her depends.  (not so dependable in that moment).  At one point she asked what we did to her?  "why did you do this to me? in a thick Jewish accent)...You are a very bad person."  I gently explained to her, as I hopped from one Dansko to the other, it was the other nurse, NOT me.  I would never do this to anyone especially knowing I had to clean it up.
She realized I was right then said "You Poor Poor Child, why do you do this work?"
I replied, "Right now, I haven't a clue".

The splatter was amazing.  My CNA was growling and I was wishing I had on full terrorist gear.

After approximately 4 hours of water poop she stopped...like a miracle of sorts.

This was only 1 of 5 of my patients and 4 of them were incontinent to stool as we say in the biz.

My night was long and stinky...

Finally the shift ended, and as I sat in my car, organizing myself for the drive home, I learned a valuable lesson.

Never use the Heated leather seats when you smell like shit.

It amplifies it 20 fold, and in a small car it is bad bad news.

There...don't tell me I have never taught you anything.

xo,

m

the outcast in a meaty world

I come from a Mid Western Meat Eating Family.  

There, I said it.  

Because of this small fact I have often been the butt of bad jokes, the outcast and misunderstood.  Not just me, but my kids too.  The strange thing about this is that it isn't the world around me...it's the immediate world within my circle.  I decided to stop eating meat when I was around 13.  It was a conscious decision after seeing a propaganda film about veal.  Let me tell you, it was not an easy decision, we lived in the South, and veal was a common meal at our table.  At that time we didn't have Satellite TV and Google...we had Encyclopedia Britannia and the Dewey Decimal System.  I never preached my veggieness and still don't...Although I do teach my kids to be strong and proud of the choice to not eat meat. ( and at this point it is a choice for them...they can eat whatever they want in school).

The vast acquaintances I meet are very respectful and interested in the choice.  During Potlucks they always say, "oh this one is Vegetarian...no cheese too!"  (Proudly)  They ask questions, albeit in a sympathetic, "Oh I tried that and nearly died" kind of way  But they don't scoff and say, "Eat a piece of meat, you will feel better" when I have a cold.

My immediate family on all sides has never been so kind.  From feeding the kids meat when they were little, "because a little bacon never hurt anyone" .  To suggesting we are unhealthy because of our weights.  ( see noted picture of my son in above post).

Here is what I am getting at with this post...There are entire countries who only eat plant based diets.  I know my family is going to feel a bit angry when reading this, including my hubbys family....(or maybe they wont) but I would like to take a minute to say I have high cholesterol on top of all I do...I can only imagine what it would be if I ate meat everyday.  I came from the same parent ( at least one) as you all did, so I am not some weird phenomenon within our gene pool.  People may feel vegetarianism is radical or severe...me thinking about cutting out dairy will surely put them over the edge....But isn't open heart surgery radical? Bowel Removal?  Triple bypass?  Gastric Bypass?  Diabetes meds you have to take 3 times a day?  Those too, are very extreme measures, especially when compared to a diet change.  See?  See, what I mean?  Yet, we roll our eyes at a natural diet and coddle the people who have found their selves sick, overweight and standing in the line at Walmart with a cart full of processed food.  

I see many of my friends and family struggle with health and making healthy decisions but I want to encourage them to try to make a change.  A real change.  Not overnight, but to stop making excuses and saying things like, "I'm addicted to food" or "I DO eat pretty healthy, I had a veggie burger last night".  To pick one small thing and do it...do it so you will live longer, so we can enjoy each other...so the kids can enjoy each other...so I don't have to worry about my friends and family always being sick and depressed...

It has been 30 years for me, I have never once told anyone, " I can't believe YOU only eat meat"  but right now I am going to say, " Please people, if you haven't started to change your diets...do it. Stop the boxed foods.  Stop the sodas and chicken nuggets...Eat something that is fresh, take a minute to prepare it, and teach your family it's ok to be healthy and different.

Let's do it together...I can always use encouragement, and I can always give encouragement.  

xo, m

I love you guys...I just want you to be healthy, and when I have a heart attack from my high cholesterol you can point your fingers...but until then, can't you just give it a try?

Just in case there is a chemical war

He's ready....

From Tour De Fat this weekend in Ft Collins.  Bubba went with his dad, on his new bike.

(and yes, I feed him, although it's not apparent from this picture)

This morning I went for a nice 4 mile run.  My run o meter says I burned 311 calories, which being the masochist I am I tell myself it's really only 211 calories and eat accordingly.  I will do arms and gut this after noon.  

Fall has come quickly here.  It dropped 20 degrees in a day.  My Pumpkins are turning orange and I can see all the projects I wanted to get done, yet didn't,

Oh well, I have nothing but time, right?